Sunday, November 15, 2009
this weekend has been really awesome!
really get to feed the word in the services and apart from that,serving the lord as well,which is really good.
though i'm feeling REALLY EXHAUSTED now,it's a good feeling,knowing that i've serve the lord,he'll restore it back to me double the portion.amen!
tomorrow's work! i'm looking forward to the week ahead because of so many reasons.
i'm still adapting to my work life.honestly whenever it's sunday night,i will feel damn sian,and i will start to "hate" work even though i don't really hate it. but it's normal i guessed since i just started working.i'm still adapting to it.
so i'm trusting that after 6 months,things will look up.in fact no need 6 months.after the 3rd month or so.amen!
today was good,didn't get to see my boy though,but i got to talk a little bit with TK,who is someone i serve with for an event.i like moments like these,where even though it's just a HI BYE gesture,or just a very simple chat,it's really heartfelt.
i really love moments like these.i'm glad that the team i worked with for the event still remembers me.hahaha!
but really i'm so thankful for that opportunity.i really felt like the change was really AWESOME!
today,had to play with k2 and P1 students,really precious young ones.there were some who really captured my attention. but i was reminded of christie, which made me wonder how's she doing now.i really missed her, esp when she sits on my lap.
well, shall stop here. going to zzzzzzzz soon,considering i woke up at 5 plus this morning.
meeting up with candy this coming week,so really excited about it!
I am living to make your name high!
Sunday, November 08, 2009
SERVICE WAS AWESOME!!
CAN'T WAIT FOR ARROW!!!!!!!
if there's one thing i could do for the rest of my life, it's to praise and worship jesus!
I am living to make your name high!
Monday, November 02, 2009
i really miss my christie today.
i missed how she look,and wondered how she is now.
sitting at the office,thinking about the few hrs i had with her, i started crying.thankfully,my colleagues didn't see,since my desk is at one corner.
i really want to walk the journey with her,to see her grow,to hold her hand. :)
it's amazing how by just a few hrs, i can fall so deeply in love with her.
on the train home,i just picturing her,and how i long to see her grow.
until i caught a revelation. that daddy god feels the same way as i do. he WANTS to walk a journey with us,holding our hands, watching us grow in him.
but comparing to me, he wishes SO MUCH MORE to walk with us. my want to walk with christie is about a small fraction compared to his want to walk with me and all of us.
I am living to make your name high!
Sunday, November 01, 2009
this weekend has probably been the most MEANINGFUL weekend ever in my entire life.
on saturday,the poly custer went to a school for cerebral palsy children to do community service.
basically we were all paired up to handle 1 child each. and i got a girl,by the name of CHRISTIE!
when i first saw her, i thought she was really well-behaved until her teacher told me that she can get super hyper and stubborn.the first hr, she was really hyper,running around,refusing to listen to me. and at my moment of flesh,i blurted out a bad word. thank god no children heard it.but i felt very condemned. at that moment, i realised that to love her, I CANNOT COUNT ON MY SELF-EFFORT.
to love her unconditionally is to rely of god's love and grace.
so i prayed to god,telling god all i want was FAVOUR AND TRUST.
favour because i want her to like me,to listen to me.
TRUST because i want her to know or to feel that if she ever needs anything, she can come to me and just rest with me. if she needs comfort,i want her to know that i will be her comfort.
god is so faithful. because what i got was so much more.
she may have run around and not listened to me at times. but i still love her so much.
i got FAVOUR and TRUST from her.
my favourite moments of all was whenever we had to sit down.because i always asked her " CHRISTIE,WANT TO SIT ON JIE JIE's LAP?" and she will just stand up and sit on my lap.
and that was TRUST from her. when she was scared,she would hug me. when she needs to go pee,she trusted me enough to know that i will handle her.
the most touching moments were the last half an hr of the event when we sat down to give the children their happy meals. and when she sitting on the floor eating her food. i asked her again to sit on my lap. and she stood up and just sat on my lap and continued to eat her food.
she was so sweet,and well-mannered. and when she was all tucked in my arms, she fell asleep.
and i felt so happy that she could trust me. and when i asked if she liked me, she nodded her head. and i just told her "JIE JIE LOVES U A LOT TOO."
her mother came, and she was dozing off,snuggling up with me.and she refused to go home.
i didn't get to say an official goodbye.but i believed that i sowed a seed in her life and the harvest time is on its way.
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at the end of everything, what i realised was god's unconditional love for ALL OF US. i could say i felt for the first time how it was like to love someone unconditionally. it wasn't easy honestly. but GOD, he doesn't just love 1 person unconditionally. HE LOVES EVERYONE UNCONDITIONALLY. and he doesn't need to try. he JUST loves. and i realise what a BIG GOD I HAVE. what a loving god i have.
and i was wondering why the 2 words FAVOUR and TRUST popped into my mind. and it was because like the little girl. god wants me to know that i have his favour and his trust, TRUST to know that when i need someone to snuggle up with,to hold me when i'm down, he will be there with arms open wide,always ready to tuck me in.
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i really miss christie. was sharing with some of my cg, i didn't expect to cry but i just couldn't hold back my tears, cause i really love her. i really wish i could have a journey with her. but i know her journey with daddy god has started when she came for the event. and daddy god is the BEST person to take a journey with.
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i'm just so honoured and blessed to be a vessel for god,to bring his love,to the children.to my christie. :D
my christie loves red,circles,butterflies,party,music and playground.
<3
I am living to make your name high!
